While stretching after my work out last night, I bumped into a fitness instructor who still teaches at the same club I used to. She looked fabulous. Toned, sleek, healthy – it wasn’t hard to tell she had been teaching a lot. While I was happy to see her, I also felt a sense of embarrassment. […]
While stretching after my work out last night, I bumped into a fitness instructor who still teaches at the same club I used to. She looked fabulous. Toned, sleek, healthy – it wasn’t hard to tell she had been teaching a lot. While I was happy to see her, I also felt a sense of embarrassment. Who was I embarrassed by? Myself.
You know how you feel when you look at a photograph of yourself from five or ten years ago? There’s this sense of nostalgia for who you were then and how you looked then, accompanied by a sense of bewilderment about how much time has changed you. Well, that’s how I felt when I saw my old instructor friend. It was like looking at a version of myself from four years ago.
I am still fit, but being ‘retirned’ from teaching has obviously changed my physique. I train differently now, so I am also a different kind of fit now than I was then. It’s still hard for me sometimes to accept that I no longer personify or live the life of a fitness leader and trainer. It’s just me now, exercising for myself, planning my own routines. I also now have a chronic injury that demands care and structure.
Are you struggling with a new version of you? Perhaps you are like me, a former athlete who’s just a regular gym member now. Or, maybe you’ve just started at the gym and are trying to adapt to the structure of going and the intimidation that comes with joining. Maybe you’ve made a career change or are going through some other life change.
As we go through life, different things will shape us and the definition of our sense of self will change as a result. At some point, all things in life shift. Life demands that we change and change demands that we be open to seeing and accepting new versions of ourselves. As you go through your transitory period, try to remember the following:
So, of course I don’t look like I did four years ago. But I don’t feel the same either. Things have changed. Who I am now is who I evolved to be and while it’s normal to pine for the past sometimes, overall I am happy with who I am. In another three years from now, I hope I can say the same.